A little panicked…

Okay, folks.  We’ve got a bit of a major crisis here in Casa de Insomniac.

Let’s say you had a certain routine before you went to bed, and that routine involved removing any and all jewelry from your person and placing it in the exact same spot upon the nightstand every night.  Let’s say you did this because you simply cannot sleep while wearing any of these accessories, and that you always promptly put them back on first thing the next morning.

Let’s also say that one of those pieces of jewelry happened to be a little more important than the $10 watch I bought at Target.  Let’s say that said piece of jewelry was small, round, and shiny.

Let’s say you woke up, made some coffee, took a shower, then returned to the bedroom to dress and accessorize, and said small, round, shiny piece of jewelry was not where you left it.  Or at least, where you thought you left it.

I have two theories:

  1. I managed to knock said piece of jewelry from the nightstand myself (not impossible, since it is right next to my bed and I do tend to move around in my sleep).
    Either that, or
  2. I didn’t properly shut the bedroom door last night and Bonnie Cat came in and decided that said piece of jewelry looked like an awful lot of fun to play with (probable, since I feel like blaming someone else and Bonnie Cat is the only other person in the apartment).

Upon realizing that said piece of jewelry was not where I thought I left it I promptly tore apart the bedroom, emptying drawers, pulling out the flashlight and looking along the baseboards and under the bed and dressers, shaking out the area rug, retracing my steps from yesterday and generally scrutinizing every square inch of the apartment for any evidence of its whereabouts.  I have literally spent all day looking for this piece of jewelry, shunning all other things I was planning to get done, with no success.  I am at a loss, and, frankly, I feel a bit naked without it.

So, without knowing what else to do, aside from hoping that Bonnie Cat didn’t eat it, I turn to you, gentle readers, for advice.  If you were an engagement ring, where would you hide?


8 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. chadhend
    Jan 29, 2009 @ 01:37:03

    Oh damn. That doesn’t sound good at all. Before I read that it was an engagement ring, I was all prepared to tell you, “Some things just disappear.” But I suppose such a comment won’t do for an engagement ring. I would, in fact, blame the cat, and I would also say in my most confident tone, “I’m sure it will turn up.” And I’m sure it will.


  2. megan
    Jan 29, 2009 @ 09:10:37

    Chad: Thanks for the vote of confidence. It’s good to have calm, rational people in my life to tell me it will all work out whilst I work myself into a tizzy.

    The conflict has been resolved, much to my great relief. Don’t ask me how, because I couldn’t begin to explain, but somehow the ring managed to lodge itself in the bed – IN BETWEEN the mattress and the box spring. As I crawled out of bed this morning, the bed sort of spat the ring out onto the floor. I’m still trying to figure out the physics on that one.

    So while my theory of a black hole within my apartment still stands (I am still missing my flashlight, my kitchen shears and my kazoo), I am now convinced that I have a man-eating bed.


  3. thenoz
    Jan 29, 2009 @ 11:36:16

    sundays at thenoz are for rest relaxation and recovery what would you suggest for us


  4. Joy
    Jan 29, 2009 @ 12:22:11

    I’m so glad you found it. My eyes were also *looking at Bonnie cat* Sorry Bonnie.


  5. megan
    Jan 29, 2009 @ 12:26:30

    thenoz: I suggest a hot cup of cocoa and a campy horror movie from the 60s, preferably starring Vincent Price and/or Christopher Lee.

    Joy: Thanks, I’m glad I found it, too. I’m still eyeing Bonnie, because I’m not entirely convinced that she didn’t have something to do with it.


  6. amy
    Jan 29, 2009 @ 20:11:35

    Don’t you mean ring eating bed? Or perhaps,it spat out the ring, because it did not have that distinct quality of man-flesh…..May I suggest for the future some form of tiny wooden/ridiculous tacky, lacy, heart-shaped box, impervious to bed and cat alike?


  7. megan
    Jan 29, 2009 @ 20:38:14

    amy: I do actually have the box the ring came in…perhaps I should make good use of it…
    I figure the bed isn’t above eating a person, so I’m sticking with man-eater. 🙂


  8. Peter K.
    Jan 31, 2009 @ 13:53:27

    Glad you were able to locate your ring.

    I lose my own about once every month or two. And with a track record like that I’ve gotten pretty good at hunting it down. Fortunately it’s always with me except when I’m at home, so that narrows down the search area to our house. It usually turns up under the smallest possible thing in sight in sight that it could hide under (ie. the lid to a small tupperware container).

    The last time though was quite a mystery. Had to go to work without it (doing so felt strangely “naked”). Later Adrienne turned it up in the baby bottle sterilizer. No idea how it could’ve gotten in there.


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